Long time, no talk! I’m diving into this blog post today because I’ve literally lost my way. What a holiday season…. Between all 3 of us (and my parents) getting super sick, I’m literally confused, brain dead and feeling sad that school starts back so soon. I am still battling this cold but today I’m feeling more like myself and that excited flutter of a new year is finally here! The above quote feels fitting for my current state of mind and future outlook. There’s nothing like a good quote to live by.
The week before Christmas I decided it was time to take a few days off and what was only meant to be a week, turned into almost 3. I have to say, I’m not good at balance when it comes to work. I guess you could say I’m all or nothing. I have not opened my computer lid this entire time! The problem is, now that I’ve taken this much time off, I’ve forgotten how to blog!
A good thing that has come from my blog/social media/etsy shop break was that I feel more focused on my goals for 2017 when it comes to work and my personal life. I love the start of a new year and I feel that my lack of work helped me to be still long enough to hear that inner voice telling me where I needed to change.
First and foremost, my goal in 2017 is to be a better mom. So often I find myself in a hurry. I’m running around trying to check off everything on my mile long to-do list and missing special moments that only moms can create for their kids. How many times did I lay my head down at the end of the day and wonder if my youngest got enough of me that day? I know the foundation between my girls and I is strong but it’s the little things that seem to fall through the cracks. Being an only child I marvel at how my 5 and 8 year old entertain each other. They are happy together, creative and always coming up with new games between the 2 of them. It’s so easy to leave them to it and bury myself in work or my own activities. In 2017, I want to sit on the floor with them more and take time to do what they are interested in. I want to recommence family game night and above all I want to stop what I’m doing and hug them more.
My 2nd goal pertains to this blog. Quite honestly, I had a great 2016 in terms of this blog and hope for more of the same. The one thing I would like to change is keeping focus on my content. I tend to say yes to a lot of affiliations because I feel intense pressure to make a decent living. I never experienced this mentality before because there was always a 2nd income to rely on. I think hustling for a pay check can kill creativity, reader/writer connection and even success. I don’t want this blog to become all about making a living-I want the message and content to be first and foremost. Something I’ve learned this year is that God provides. I’m frugal with the money I make and give back 10% to my church and while there have been some really hairy months, ends were always met and then some. For 2017, I want to focus on being genuine. I want to share my life as a single mom more. I want to share what my everyday looks like in terms of making healthy decisions and DIY skin care. I greatly fear appearing self righteous and self absorbed but I have to keep in mind how much I adore other bloggers who share their ups and downs. It’s a powerful way to connect.
My 3rd goal is about me. It seems like this year I have been coming to terms with my personality. I was attacked by my x-husband before he left about my homebody tendencies and called boring and a creature of habit. Since then I have contemplated whether these somewhat true descriptions of myself were a negative thing. For the record, I am not boring. In 2016 I made many new friends that I’m so incredibly thankful for but each of them are very extroverted which has made me feel even more different and possibly less then. So, in 2017, I want to accept my personality traits even if they might be a bit more dramatic due to life circumstances. I want to continue to heal from past hurts and always work on staying true to who I am. I want to focus on being a thoughtful friend who might not be down for a lady’s night very often but who can be counted on in times of need. I guess what I’m really trying to say is, I want to be comfortable in my own skin. Somewhere along the way, I lost that and 2017 is the year to get that back.
A few little things I’m working on for 2017:
- I need more music in my life. I was a musician for over 15 years and couldn’t live without music but since I’ve had kids, I just don’t pursue good music anymore. Music used to be my oxygen. It inspired me greatly and was a life line and somewhere along the way, life became silent. I want to bring music back-this sounds very Captain von Trapp of me, huh?
- I want to turn the TV off more in the evening. The girls go to bed at 8 pm sharp and every night I curl up with my kitties and puppy and watch TV-80% of the time I watch LAME tv. I would love to turn the TV off and read more. I am currently reading books by Susan Branch. I highly recommend her books.
- I want to start to write/journal. I believe documenting life is so therapeutic as well as helpful. I often feel inspired to write things down for my girl’s sake but I never follow through. This is the year that I learn to put what’s in my head on paper. You would think I would be better at it but sharing personal things on this blog has proven to be hard because I over think it and before publishing I talk myself out of it for fear of appearing self absorbed. I want to find a writing medium where I won’t be tied down to how I will be perceived.
- I want to upgrade my coffee this year. I drink Dunkin Donuts-gasp. For all the other changes I’ve made in my daily routine, coffee is not one of them. It so should be since I drink 2 cups a day! Coffee is something many of us drink a lot of daily and when you’re drinking genetically modified coffee beans, hormone/antibioitc filled cream and white sugar your body stays in a state of offense. I don’t like sugar in my coffee and now use organic half and half but my coffee brand is not good so if you have an organic coffee you like, please share!!
- As always, I want to exercise more. I got a spin bike for home and I’m hoping I can get in a good habit of exercising more. I’m tired of wasting time on a gym commute as well as wasting time waiting for a class to start. I got THIS super affordable spin bike and so far, it feels just as sturdy as the bikes at the gym.
- I live on 2 acres of wooded land. Daily, we have the privilege of seeing 2-6 deer cross through our backyard. Not to mention opossums, raccoons and loads of bunnies and birds. I’ve always thought of myself as a friend to nature but never really supported the wildlife in my own backyard. This year I’m saving for a deer feeder as well as creating a bird seed budget. I find our land nothing short of enchanted so it seems sinful to not give back.
Now I’d love to hear from you! What are your goals this year? I might need to add more to my list-I am feeling pretty brain dead-lol! I hope you all had a wonderful holiday season and if not, I hope you are finding great peace and hope for 2017! And feel free to leave your opinion on what posts you would like to see here this year-more makeup tutorials, health posts or skin care recipes?
xx, Jenni
Oh my dear friend Jennifer 🙂 There is nothing wrong with being a home body. I”m sure when you take the time to play with your girls you will see and remember just how much fun you are. You and me are goofy. Let your goofiness shine. Do you ever go to Pandora.com to listen to music? I wish you all the best in 2017.
Melissa-You’re like my homebody in crime! Through all that’s happened I feel like I’m just now getting back to my goofy, silly self. I am usually on spotify. I haven’t tried Pandora.
I wish you the best in 2017 as well!! Big hugs, friend!
Oh Jenni, I can’t believe someone would say you are not interesting and are boring. I find you highly intriguing and I love reading your blog. I don’t always get a chance to but… you know…LIFE happens but I absolutely love you. And I really hope that someday somehow I get to meet you.
I am so glad you are finally feeling better. Regrets about our children feel like they will never end. I pray all the time that I won’t regret things I do right now but I think it’s impossible. I write this as I’ve been up for 2 hours crying almost inconsolably because my 10yo got suspended yesterday for bringing a knife to school. I can’t figure out why he would do this and I am so upset. He found it at the park like 5 months ago and hid it in his room. He found it a few days ago and decided to take it to school. It’s a medium sized steak knife. He wasn’t trying to hurt or scare anyone he just wanted attention. I have a 18mo and a very high maintenance 3yo girl. I am already so stretched. I want to blame all this on myself but should I? Could I have prevented it? He doesn’t even go out that much. There is 1 friend in the neighborhood I let him visit and one day in the fall they rode their bikes to a little park at the back of our neighborhood. That’s the day he found it.
I don’t know about other readers but I enjoy hearing about everything. What kind of music did/do you play? I never learned anything but I grew up with an older brother that played constantly. He could be found walking around our small town playing his guitar. I called him my own personal radio.
I’ve been taking a class at my gym called PiYo. Have you heard of it? It’s Pilates and Yoga INSPIRED but it’s not a yoga class or Pilates class. It is INTENSE. I always leave class feeling sweaty and stinky and great! When you can feel the sweat dripping down your back during your workout you know it’s a good one and I get that every time with PiYO. It’s definitely something you can do at home and you will see results so fast. I have muscles in my legs that I never knew existed. I think it’s a part of the Beach Body program but if you get a second maybe check it out. I absolutely love it.
Your 2 acres of land sound amazing and so do your daughters. Sorry for such a long post.
Hi Liz! Thank you for writing this! I don’t put a lot of weight on anything my x-husband says but now that I’m single, I guess I’ve started to dissect what I’m putting out there! Thank you for saying I’m intriguing-that’s a great compliment!!
I feel for you and your son. I don’t have boys but to me, this sounds like such a boy thing-it sounds pretty innocent but unfortunately no one can take chances these days. Where I live it’s deer hunting season and even girls 7 and 8 years old are hunting and killing deer-seems crazy compared to a boy who found a knife in a park and was intrigued by it. I think you know whether this is innocent or not and my bet is it’s innocent. Boys love their weapons!! I can’t imagine having 3 kiddos all different genders and ages! Hats off to you!
I was a piano performance major and I also played the flute in orchestra throughout college. I didn’t do anything with it but miss it! Your brother sounds like the coolest guy in town! I always wanted to learn guitar.
I have not heard of PiYO-Sounds really neat! My gym doesn’t offer it yet but I bet they will soon! I agree, those spin classes I took this summer made me drip sweat like crazy-so detoxifying!
Thanks so much for taking the time to comment! Good luck with your son-it was probably a lesson learned the hard way for him.
Also, what book would you recommend by Susan Branch? I’m going to the library today and could use a good book.
Liz-She does a lot of cookbooks but she has a trilogy about her life which is what I’m reading. The first one is called Fairy Tale Girl-it’s the best place to start however she says you can read them out of order but I would prefer to start from the beginning.
Jenni, LOVE your openness and transparency. You are an amazing mom and are blessed that your girls entertain each other. But I totally get what you mean about getting down on the floor with them. And yes, please share your life…what a day looks like for you. Maybe some people like picture perfect, but I am always more drawn to people who are open and real, not those people who make their life look like it is amazing 100% of the time. About the TV… you won’t miss it. It’s just a habit. And lastly, about the coffee… read my latest blog post. I have found the perfect coffee for you. Seriously, check it out. Timing couldn’t be better. Thanks for always being an inspiration to me!
Elizabeth-thanks so much!! Oh-I’m excited to check out your post! Thanks for always being so encouraging!
Hi Jenni, Happy New Year! You have some admirable goals. My kids are grown and I remember so well the days when they were at home. I stayed at home with them and am also a diy-er so we had a lot of fun making things over the years. It was a great way to spend time and also fostered skills they have as adults (like cooking- they are great cooks!) But anything you do with your children you won’t regret, I promise you! The days go by far too fast.
I’ve never been divorced but can imagine it would shake anyone to the core. It’s all a process, everything in life is. I wish you well with it and you seem to be embracing the “what is” about your life. Fantastic!
Your blog is my very favorite and I’ve made many wonderful things. But I don’t know if I’ve ever thanked you and want to right now. THANK YOU 🙂
I have goals this year as well. At the top of my list is more exercise. I absolutely hate it. Always have. But we must move! So that’s my main goal. Also to be in better touch with the people I love. I am such a homebody and love to read so sometimes I am just in my own little world- need to reach out more!
Have a wonderful year on this journey called life.
xo
Sue
I love reading your blog! I have learned so much, thank you! I have been making most of my skin care for several years but have just tried making the basics. Since I have been reading your posts I have branched out to making serums. Love the pumpkin seed one! I am 60 and would like to read your opinion on light therapy. Thank you for the time and effort that you share with us!